Cryptid Kid

The Ghost of Christmas Past 2

2011-12-24T01:14:00.001-08:00

Back in 1974, Due to the power of blanket advertising (on the back of my weekly B&W reprint Marvel Comics) I knew that the Marvel Treasury Special - Superhero Holiday Grab-Bag would be the perfect accompaniment to my Christmas, like cranberry sauce and turkey. Even though Marvel had coyly avoided using the word 'Christmas' on the cover, the surfeit of holly wreathing some of my favourite heroes (Spider-Man, The Thing, The Hulk) smelt strongly and evocatively of the festive season. In the UK we still don't opt to say 'Happy Holidays' - afterall, what could be less offensive than Christmas? And I've even known Sikhs who had Christmas presents as children (from their parents) and Jewish friends and co-workers who seemed to send a heck of a lot of Christmas cards. Nearly twenty years ago when I worked for the Attorney General I remember that he received a Christmas card from the CIA. So Christmas really is for everyone...even the CIA.

Pester power failed in 1974 and I didn't get the Holiday Grab-Bag - although I did get the rather more expensive Avengers annual for 1975 (Don Heck, Avengers and X-Men versus Magneto) so I can hardly complain. Those annuals were printed with a garish almost fluorescent ink which emitted a strong smell which filled the whole room you were reading in. The odour has almost gone now, but if I crush my nose against the pages of that annual and breathe deeply it's as good as a time machine- I'm straight back to 1974. I recall that both publications had Captain America on the cover and I had no idea who he was. But I thought he had a cool costume.

I finally picked up the Grab-Bag at a London comic fair in the 1990's. That allows me to give you the Christmas greeting from the back cover which is a 180 reverse view of the heroes leaping through the holly wreath .

May you have PEACE ON EARTH and GOOD WILL TOWARD MEN...UNTIL WE MEET AGAIN!

Ghosts of Christmas Past

2011-12-04T12:45:00.000-08:00

It is December 1969 in this picture and so I am three and half years old. It was taken in the Co-op Department Store on Parliament Street in Nottingham. As part of the queueing system that year you took a ride on a rocket ship to Santa's Grotto on the moon. So in this picture I think I am on the moon. The white cap is my complimentary Nottingham Co-op Astronaut hat and I still have the button badge I am wearing on my lapel. I was still in a push chair and my push chair couldn't fit on the rocket so the Co-op ladies wheeled it around to the Moon Grotto while we were "in flight" - watching a graphic representation of our trip to the moon on a circular screen.

I have no clear recollection of what I am saying but the family story is that I am asking for cufflinks for my father (he's had a pair stolen from his desk at work) and that I am asking for a bottle of gin for my mother (she didn't drink gin - obviously) primed to do this by my Dad because it would embarass her.

And this year is the first year I have not had to engage in the compulsory perpetuation of the Santa myth while I've been a parent...oh the relief...the lack of sneaking about...it's like I've been one of the elders in the M. Night Shyalmalan movie 'The Village' these last few years.

From My Bookshelf: Gullivar Jones

2011-11-09T12:40:00.000-08:00

I first encountered Lieutenant Gullivar Jones in Marvel's British weekly black and white reprints where he was updated to be a Vietnam veteran transported to Mars by dying Martian wizard Lu-Pov (an in-joke over the name of Richard Lupoff - I guess). He immediately became one of my fave characters and I really loved the art (although I wasn't big on reading credits boxes at age 8) by Gil Kane, Ross Andru and Gray Morrow.

Later I also obtained reprints of the original novel - by Edwin L Arnold (also author of Phra the Phoenician) - as a kid I didn't get too far into this before I realised that it was quite different to the comic book. To be honest, a little tamer... the comic strip had been really jazzed up to make it more like John Carter of Mars by Edgar Rice Burroughs. Re-reading the novel just recently I found it to be quite beautifully written and very humourous too. I wouldn't be the first person to see the influence of The Time Machine on the story - yes, the Hither and Thither (!) people are reminiscent of the Eloi and the Morlocks but the inclusion of the magic carpet as Gullivar's mode of transport to Mars seems to bring us into the Arabian Nights style of storytelling. Joe Petagno's cover has Gullivar (re-spelled as Gulliver in these editions) surfing to Mars on his carpet while the sublime Frazetta cover of the Ace edition has Gully Jones at the feet of two battling titanic Martian monsters like a character in a Harryhausen movie.

Oh yeah, I mentioned that Arnold's other book was Phra the Phoenician and of course Gullivar in the comic book encounters a huge humanoid amphibian called Phra.

Bonfire Night!

2011-11-05T08:15:00.000-07:00

For those suffering the disappointment of a lack of live-blogging regarding trick or treaters on Monday; I was visited by inumerable skeletons, witches, ghosts, vampires and one very tiny Batman.

Tonight is Bonfire Night...which here at Gately Mansion we'll be celebrating with masses of fireworks (a curry!) and no bonfire. And if you're setting off fireworks follow the firework code - as advised by Guy Fawkes himself in this Standard Fireworks ad from 1974.

By the way, I am old enough to remember fireworks that you were allowed to hold - one was called the Olympic Torch - and also a rather terrifying hovering and spinning firework called The Flying Saucer (natch!).

Halloween Part 1 - Growing Up Slightly Spooked...

2011-10-30T12:19:00.000-07:00

It felt like I grew up on the very edge of the countryside; only a few hundred yards away were open fields. My street was the penultimate street before farmland, the first house on a development of houses built on sold off land that had belonged to a large house...and if this was a Stephen King story the big old house - it doesn't even seem too big when I look at it now - would be the focus of this tale, but it isn't, so it isn't (if you're still with me).

We had a long thin garden and at the end of our garden beyond the hedge was a group...I hesitate to say street for there didn't seem to be any roads...of derelict cottages. And they were really, really old. I hear 16th or 17th Century most frequently in relation to them and maybe at some stage our garden had been their rubbish heap because it was full of broken fragments of claypipe - little white tubes (my Dad even found a pretty much whole pipe and smoked it for a while...very Solomon Kane!).

These cottages were pretty creepy - and one - seemed to be the largest was very near the hedge and seemed to overlook my garden from a single large broken window. I say overlooked...what I imagined was a witch watching me from the window as I played. A witch probably inspired by the Witch from the Dutch TV show 'Paulus the Gnome' which played on my local ITV station. I sometimes mentioned the witch to my mother at a very young age (4? 5?) but I couldn't have been that scared because I took to creeping through a hole in the hedge into the grounds of the cottages. I tended to confine myself to the 'gardens' rather than dare go into the houses. But I did notice things inside the houses...someone had carried a bale of straw from the fields and opened it up in one room to make bedding. Giving me the erroneous impression that some invisible creature was trying to make the place more comfortable. "Probably a tramp," explained my mother. But we didn't get a lot of tramps out in the country. I suppose teenagers/courting couples was more likely but they too must've been very low profile.

As I grew older I realised that what I had thought was a witch was a broken section of plaster on the far wall beyond the window. I now perceived the shape to be more like a sailing ship...broad sails and gib instead of pointy nose and hat.

Around the age of six I came home one day and the quality of light in the back garden seemed different...and I swear...I was able to relax and breathe slightly more easily. It took a moment to realise what had happened. Without warning, in the course of a single day the spooky old cottages had been demolished. The setting sun made long shadows on our vegetable patch and lawn in ways it had never been able to previously.

That evening I snuck through the hedge again and surveyed a mass of broken bricks that stood in front of me like a mountain. Whatever lived in there ghost, monster or witch could not have survived that...

Then a voice suddenly shouted at me in the semi-darkness of this overgrown and wrecked garden.
"Little boys aren't allowed to play in here!" The black and beastly monstrous shape resolved itself to be a security guard with a big German Shepherd dog. With my heart in my mouth I dove through the hedge like a rabbit and never returned (to what would soon be just a rather mundane building site).

The cottages only exist now in the terrain of my imagination and a totally unreadable novella I penned at age 16 under heavy Stephen King and James Herbert influence. And if I have chance tomorrow I'm going to try live blogging updates on the number of trick or treaters who come to my door with general observations on the celebration of Halloween during my lifetime in the UK. See you then my people.

Paul Temple - The Gilbert Case

2011-10-15T06:31:00.000-07:00

http://www.bbc.co.uk/i/rlb29/

If there are any other obsessive Paul Temple fans out there, don't forget that a new story started this week and is available on BBC iplayer.

Where the Heck...

2011-10-15T06:13:00.000-07:00

I've wanted to visit Meteor Crater in Arizona since I first saw a picture of it in a Ladybird Book circa 1972. The Apollo astronauts used the bottom of the crater for training purposes hence the spacesuit 'standee.'

The Surprise Return of 'Where the Heck'

2011-10-11T12:49:00.000-07:00

It's been a long time since we played...but where the heck is this? And for those who find this too easy: Where am I in the image I'm currently using as a Facebook profile image?

The Private Life of Sherlock Holmes

2011-10-11T12:31:00.000-07:00

It takes very little provocation for me to witter on endlessly about the genius of Billy Wilder's movie 'The Private Life of Sherlock Holmes' - the plot is quite twisty and turny so it seems strange that the movie poster (as seen here on the cover of Movie Collector Magazine July/August 1994) looks to me like one massive spoiler...
It also has one of the most haunting musical scores ever written for a movie...and...the most frightening (totally without warning/broad-daylight) TV moment of my childhood in the Glen Nahurich cemetery when the 'little boys' visit the grave of their brother. If you've seen the movie you won't have forgotten that sequence.

Tales of the Shadowmen 8 - Agents Provocateurs

2011-09-26T11:43:00.000-07:00

It's the time of year when your mind is probably turning to the Christmas gifts you intend to buy for your hard to please relatives. I suggest that Tales of the Shadowmen Volume 8 - Agents Provocateurs from Black Coat Press http://www.blackcoatpress.com/talesshadowmen09c.htm
would probably make an ideal gift for well, practically anyone who enjoys well written fantastic fiction. Modesty very nearly prevents me from pointing out that this volume contains my story 'Leviathan Creek' - which coincidentally features Gaston Leroux's character Joseph Rouletabille - who is kinda sorta the inspiration for the TV character Jonathan Creek. Oh, take a risk and buy a copy for everyone you know...

What to do when your son outgrows Spider-man and you still haven't...

2011-09-24T07:10:00.000-07:00

And so it came to pass, in early December 1974 (when I was almost eight and half years old) that I trudged through the snow the mile and a smidge from my parent's house into town to the bakers to buy several large 'bloomer' style loaves of bread (don't laugh). My imagination is summoning up a recollection of deep snow drifts that probably comes from the movie the Thing rather than what I actually trudged through...anyway it was cold and even the big empty red shopping bag I'd been dispatched with seemed heavy. The most difficult part of the task was actually getting noticed and served in a busy bakers where the counter seemed to be a good two and half feet above my head and all the serving ladies seemed to think I was there with another adult who was being served rather than on my own. What seemed like an eternity later I lugged the now full shopping bag (full of still warm, beautiful smelling crusty bread) out into the street and towards home. Then it hit me...it was a Saturday morning and it was still early. There would be new British Marvel Comics in the newsagents - and just to explain - they would not be there for long. There only ever seemed to be a handful delivered and they soon disappeared from the shelves. Getting comics at this time was entirely predicated on having a regular order with your newsagents - my regular order at this time was for Planet of the Apes and Dracula Lives* (which contained little in the way of the superhero stories I longed for (and superhero stories were not approved of, well by anybody really. Admitting to liking superheroes was like admitting to having a low IQ: irrespective of the reading age that they were aimed at, they were universally condemned as 'being for babies'). I digress. So to recap: it is Saturday morning. There are comics. And I have the change from the bakers. Who can stop me? What can possibly go wrong? Nothing. The manager of the newsagent had once said to me "Hey, this isn't a library!" as I was reaching for a comic with the money to pay for it in my hand, er having not been reading the comic at any time. Idiot. The moron was not present. A pleasant lady served me. I trudged home through the snow drifts that you will have seen in both versions of the Thing (Hawkes and Carpenter) except probably bigger. The comic I bought was Spider-Man Comics Weekly #96 - offsale date December 14th 1974 - a reprint of Spider-Man's first encounter with The Prowler. Phenomenal John Buscema art and a backup Kirby Thor strip. My Mother was not impressed with the selection of this classic comic and the spending of the 7p of her change on it. "Well, I did walk through the snow," I offered lamely. She explained that if she had known I was going to spend the 7p she would've walked throught the snow herself. Yeah, right.

So I told you that so I could tell you this. My hypothesis is that you will not now find an eight and a half year old boy with that level of interest in Spider-Man any more than you would find an eight year old boy who is interested in Thomas the Tank Engine. My son 'outgrew' Spider-Man some considerable time ago (he is 8). In the UK vast majority of Spider-Man related clothing finishes at age 6. Why is this? Particularly when there are 12 certificate Spider-Man movies and there is nothing infantile (I would contend!) about the character. This is only a theory, but I think Spider-Man has become some sort of 'avatar' (or maybe poster-boy) for the beginnings of the sort of adventurous play in which boys first stray out of parental reach when climbing and jumping around ("Look at me! I'm Spider-Man!). And so, it has become somthing to grow out of rather than something to enjoy at any age (Like Star Wars and Lego now seem to be).

So to answer my own question: I shall continue to buy Spider-man comics even though my son has grown out of them. In particular, reprints of the classic Romita/Gil kane era. Last month I bought from the Works a bargain basement digest sized reprint vol of Spider-Man 86 onwards. The final story is a Prowler story and I haven't read it before. Son, you don't know what you're missing...

*NB my order for Planet of the Apes and Dracula Lives was at a different newsagent nowhere near the bakers. Glad we cleared that up.

Luke Starkiller...I mean Skywalker...

2011-09-04T12:11:00.000-07:00

I guess it is something of an open secret that Jack Kirby influenced George Lucas...Doctor Doom is like Darth Vader yadda yadda etc. But I've also had an inkling that the Kenneth Robeson Doc Savage stories were also an influence - "Phantom Menace" could almost be Doc Savage book title. Sorting through a pile of old comics I was reminded today of this when I saw the cover to Justice Inc. #2. Well, there aren't many places outside the context of Star Wars where you can see the words Sky and Walker in such close proximity. If I'm ever stuck in an elevator with George Lucas I'll be able to ask him if Justice Inc was his favourite Kirby comic. If memory serves, Luke's name was changed to be Skywalker and the last minute from Starkiller (which hardly rolls off the tongue but is quite Kirbyesque).

From My Bookshelf: Damnation Alley

2011-08-31T11:29:00.000-07:00

So you see, in simpler times you could sell more copies of your film novelization if you could point out that you were also the publisher of the novelization of Star Wars...well you could if you were Sphere Books circa 1977. Roger Zelazny is, of course, one of my favourite authors and probably the one I am most likely to be busted for ripping off the style of (I throw myself on the mercy of the court and ask for several offences to be taken into consideration). From left to right we have Jackie Earle Haley who did a nice line in post apocalyptic kids (cf Planet of the Apes TV show) and Jan Michael Vincent drawn by somebody who probably wished they were drawing Charles Bronson, by the look of it. The Paul Winfield likeness is OK but George Peppard (complete with bad moustache) and Dominique Sanda could be practically anybody.

Damnation Alley was also the 'inspiration' for the Judge Dredd Cursed Earth sequence which contributed to my childhood lack of understanding of the laws of copyright. And the movie was the first time I came across the idea that the lights in Vegas would never go out (due to the automation of Hoover Dam - though I'm not sure this was properly explained).

Back at Montacute..

2011-08-31T11:19:00.000-07:00

Took another trip to the extraordinary collection of TV memorabilia and comics at Montacute this summer...here are just a few images. Normal posting (including the second part of the extremely popular 'Life in London' theme ) will resume shortly. Take it easy my people.

Great Schoolyard Trades of my Childhood

2011-08-18T12:16:00.000-07:00

1975: Swapped a very big poster of a Tyrannosaurus Rex for...Martin Caidin's Operation Nuke - the second Cyborg/Six Million Dollar Man story. The kind of swap you just can't regret...can't trade him if you can't beat him if you can't love him. He's the man.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HLZpebCmplQ

FROM MY BOOKSHELF: Doc Savage

2011-08-12T03:05:00.000-07:00

Here's my rather battered copy of Doc Savage - His Apocalyptic Life from 1981 by Philip Jose Farmer. It has a beautiful cover illustration by Ken Barr who, I think, also provided some covers for Marvel's Black and White Rampaging Hulk Magazine back in the late 1970's (I haven't thought about that for a while - anybody remember Bereet and the Krylorians? I seemed to spend a lot of time reading those stories at the time). I started reading Doc Savage with the Sargasso Ogre in probably about 1975 and around the same time the British Marvel Superheroes Weekly was reprinting the US Marvel Doc Savage stories in installments. The George Pal movie of Doc was disappointing (though Ron Ely was well cast) and I recall seeing it on a birthday party outing as a double-bill with the Doug McClure movie Warlords of Atlantis. Doc Savage played first and my fellow kids were excruciatingly bored...knowing I was a fan...one whispered to me "Is this story almost over?" about a quarter of the way through (conversely my son whispered to me last week during the Captain America movie, "This isn't the end is it, Dad? I don't want this ever to end!").

So, it seems like I've always been a Doc fan and I guess I always will. Right now I'm reading World's Fair Goblin in the Nostalgia Ventures version (the Bantam edition has somehow always eluded me). Nostalgia Ventures can be hard to come by in the UK and are hellishly expensive to import but I managed to pick up this one at a local comic fair.

Sculpture in the Sanctuary

2011-08-11T06:23:00.000-07:00

And here are some pictures I took the other day at the Sculpture in the Sanctuary event in Nottinghamshire. Yes, the giant head is crammed with thousands of toy soldiers. Don't ask me why!

LIFE IN LONDON: She's My Lois Lane

2011-08-10T02:06:00.000-07:00

I lived in London for about 13 years altogether and for most of that time I worked at the Serious Fraud Office, which is based just off Grays Inn Road. This means that quite often I could be found at lunchtime in the local bookstore that was not far from the corner of Theobalds Road. This shop had quite a good selection of books on the craft of writing itself - some of which still grace the 'bookshelf of Babel' of previous posts. In addition, somewhere in the back of my mind I've always equated London with the Metropolis of the Superman stories; I was conscious that I'd grown up in a small town (Smallville!) and I wouldn't be staying there forever nor indeed for long. So one lunchtime I was pretty surprised to end up in conversation with Lois Lane...or rather I would've been surprised had I known who she was. I was just trying to be a literary Good Samaritan since she seemed very disappointed that the store could not obtain for her a copy of Richard Condon's The Manchurian Candidate. Indeed, it seemed that the book was out of print and in those far off pre-internet, pre-Amazon days, pre-e-bay days that was pretty much going to be the end of it unless I loaned her my copy. Well I guess she could've spent the next few weeks looking for it secondhand but she needed it in a hurry. I told her I had a copy I'd be willing to lend but I must have it back. She explained that she was appearing in the play of the Manchurian Candidate that would be running that summer at the Lyric Theatre Hammersmith and that her name was Lorelei. Lorelei was blonde, American, impossibly classy, mid-thirties-ish and with a confidence that was reverbing off the walls of the small bookshop like 5.1 surround sound. Her voice was something like Kathleen Turner's and everything she said was delivered like dialogue. The arrangement was that I'd drop off the book to the bookstore but that she would return it to my place of work when she'd done with it. Frankly, I've lent books to close friends and never seen them again so I think the purpose of this was to let her know where I worked (er not sure to what end now.. The implied threat that the whole thing would be turned over to the Serious Fraud Office unreturned book division presumably...). Anyways, while dropping off the book the bookstore staff referred to Lorelei as Mrs King. And at that point I slapped my forehead. How many American actresses called Lorelei could be working in London? This was Lorelei King who I listened to on radio all the time. She played all the female roles in Flywheel, Shyster and Flywheel, the Marx Bros show on Radio 4 and she had played Lois Lane in the Trial of Superman radio show. Subsequently she would even play Sue Storm in the Fantastic Four. I hadn't lived in London that long and it felt like the first person I struck up a conversation with was Lois Lane! When she returned the book it was with a Manchurian Candidate postcard with her phone number on. I rang her to try to blag a couple of complimentary tickets to the play - I'd developed a sense of entitlement to something free since she'd borrowed my book. Looking back I probably sounded like the kid from Robot Chicken who's in the elevator with George Lucas (You're George Lucas!). "Hey," I commenced, "I know who you are!"
"Really?" She intoned in her hushed, crushed velvety, best Jessica Rabbit impersonation. "Who am I?"
"You're Lorelei King off the radio. You're Lois Lane! Can I have a coupla free tickets for me an' my girlfriend?" Well at least I didn't try to hit on her...and frankly, nothing could've been further from my mind. It was her tickets I wanted and Lorelei pronounced that I was worthy of a single ticket "I don't get comps" so I'd have to pay for the girlfriend myself. Regular readers note that my wife and girlfriend are the same person, separated only by the passage of the years.

I haven't retained the ticket stubs but my best guess is that we went to see the play on 10th August 1991. Which would make it exactly twenty years ago today. In the bar afterwards we had a couple of drinks with Lorelei and chatted about her radio work and in particular Flywheel, Shyster and Flywheel. We were very briefly joined by Sian Phillips as she said goodbye to Lorelei - but perhaps most strangely Lorelei told me that she had recounted to Richard Condon when he visited the set the tale of how she obtained her copy of the Manchurian Candidate from a member of staff at the Serious Fraud Office. Lorelei bade us good night in a "You kids be careful on your way home" kind of way and that was almost the last I ever saw of her. I saw her from a distance once in Leicester Square a few years later, but mainly I saw her on TV - she's in an episode of Not Going Out, a couple I think of Jonathan Creek and was also in the movie Notting Hill.

Lorelei, a fellow shopper from 1990's London salutes you!

Now the slightly un-gentlemanly bit which has me hoping Lorelei never finds this post...I checked wikipedia for her age regarding my guess that she was in her mid-thirties at the time and was surprised to discover that we are roughly the same age (so I was just barely 25 - which seemed younger then than it does now and she was 28ish). Well, I'm not going to demand to see the long form of her birth certificate. The confidence and maturity were adding years to her...

Bookshelf of Babel

2011-07-18T12:38:00.000-07:00

I was just tidying up the computer when I stumbled upon this old picture of one of my bookshelves. Not even sure why I took it but it probably dates from at least 7 or 8 years ago. The amazing thing is how much I've crammed onto an apparently full bookshelf in the intervening years. I hesitate to take another picture because light may not be able to escape its gravitational field...so we can't play whose bookshelf is this because you know it is mine; but can anyone accurately guess another book or object that is now on this bookshelf circa 2011? Too difficult?

Where the Heck is this, again?

2011-07-12T10:07:00.000-07:00

Any takers? These are usually too easy...

Sherlock Holmes Statue Edinburgh

2011-07-12T10:04:00.001-07:00

Here are some mean and moody shots of the statue of everyone's favourite consulting detective in Edinburgh.

Attic Revelations...

2011-07-06T11:27:00.000-07:00

I'm afraid I've been teasing you. My 'attic' is really the Montacute Museum of TV, Radio and Toys in Somerset. But, of course, if you are ever in Somerset you can look round it, while my attic is not open to the public. However, it is strange to walk around a museum where all of my most prized possessions are just a sub-set of the exhibits on display.

Quint's House

2011-07-05T12:09:00.000-07:00

One interesting thing about having this blog is that you can see the searches that people are doing that lead them here. I'd just like to apologise to the person who was looking for information about Quint's House in Jaws who was randomly brought here by their search engine. That is weird. There's no information about Jaws on this blog. But maybe there should be...I shall remedy that at some point!

Is this Really my Attic - Part 2

2011-07-05T11:51:00.000-07:00

This has certainly got people talking. But is this really my attic? It looks like my attic and lots of my stuff seems to be in it...all will be revealed tomorrow.

My Highly Organised Attic...

2011-07-04T12:31:00.000-07:00

Certainly got my attic looking pretty organised at the moment...do you like it? Or do I? Who thinks this is really my attic? Have any of you been in my attic to know? Or is this just another thinly disguised game of "Where the Heck is this?"

Stranger than People:Is this the Truth about Trolls?

2011-07-02T11:48:00.000-07:00

OK, we haven't had a Stranger than People illustration for a while so here goes...here the legendary annual expounds the theory that trolls are a racial memory of neanderthals. As usual, the authors seem a little ahead of their time. And talking of Neanderthals, I was at Creswell Crags in Nottinghamshire last week looking at caves where Neanderthals actually resided once. I'll post some pics of that when I get chance, if only to show that the place looks rather like a caveman movie film set.

Abominable Snowman

2011-06-27T11:33:00.000-07:00

I mentioned the other day that I picked up a cryptozoological bargain in Oxfam and so here it is: Ivan T Sanderson's Abominable Snowmen: Legend Come to Life. I'd never heard of it before and certainly never seen it. I was amazed that it pre-dated the Patterson-Gimlin 'Sasquatch' footage from 1967 because inside there is an illustration of a female bigfoot uncannily similar to the 'man in suit' presented in the footage. Better yet, though it's tough to get a good scan of because the book is thick and the image near the spine, there is also an illustration of a Yeti with a high sagittal crest. Put the two together and I start to wonder if Patterson/Gimlin had this book and took to their costume designer and said, "Hey, make us something like this!" Alternatively, maybe they rented a cine camera for the weekend, went pony trekking the woods and captured the real Bigfoot on film. You pays the money and you makes the choice. In my case, £6.99 (ouch!) in Oxfam West Bridgford - cheap at half the price...

Starved of the Interweb

2011-06-23T11:54:00.000-07:00

Wow! Just back on line after a week waiting for my new router to arrive...how have I survived without internet access for all this time...argh!! Normal service will be resumed shortly! Postings ahoy!!

Is it True - Loch Ness Monster

2011-06-15T12:10:00.000-07:00

Well, to answer the criticism that there not enough cryptozoology in this cryptozoology themed blog (and to celebrate that this month it is thirty umpty years since my boyhood trip to Loch Ness) here's the cover of Valiant Comic from 22nd June 1968. The 'Is it True' question posed is 'Is it true that the Loch Ness Monster collided with a tug thirty years previously" - Have a look inside to find out, chums! I suppose in those pre-google/pre-wikipedia days you could get away with that sort of question!

And tomorrow I shall share with you my latest cryptozoology themed charity shop purchase...

Take it easy my people.

Revenge of Where the Heck...

2011-06-11T07:30:00.000-07:00

Curse you Dan Roberts...you are too good for me...but just to prove it...where the heck is this?

Where the Heck is this?

2011-06-11T07:14:00.000-07:00

It seems the earlier 'Where the Heck' was all too easy for some people...so try this one.

Where the Heck is this?

2011-06-11T06:54:00.000-07:00

OK, so you think you're pretty smart. This is an easy game when you've been there but...here's a more difficult one...you haven't sat outside a pub just here. And it isn't Costa Rica.

Stranger than People: Spider

2011-06-11T06:36:00.000-07:00

I was just puzzling over which image from the legendary Stranger than People annual to upload when I saw an article over on the BBC website about spiders that breathe underwater using bubbles. http://www.bbc.co.uk/nature/13614742 - google or cut and paste into your browser or whatever...

So here is The Yellow Monster of Sundra Strait - a fictional tale from Ted Hallam in the Stranger than People annual. Take it easy...

Where the Heck - Answer

2011-06-08T12:25:00.000-07:00

First of all, well done to all the Nottinghamites, Ex-Nottinghamites and East Midlanders who correctly identified the 'structure' as being in Nottingham. Er, well done for not having amnesia. Loyal follower Jenny Hardy was probably closest with suggesting that it is a melting house...it is indeed a house formed out of the natural sandstone of Castle Rock. The gate in the picture is actually the exit of the Mortimer's Hole cave tour at Nottingham Castle and the eagle-eyed will have spotted a poster of Jonas Armstrong as Robin Hood. They tell you if you go on the tour that the unusual central heating was in the form of sheep kept on the lower floor...the rising heat from their bodies warmed the house (!). So a complimentary ride on the Loch Ness Monster for Jenny and a souvenir lump of finest Sherwood sandstone to everyone else.

I went on the Mortimer's Hole tour in probably about 1977 and again after many years living in London a couple or so years ago...I had a nasty case of (sot of) deja vu right at the end of the tour when I realised I could remember almost word for word what the guide was saying from having been on the 1977 tour and that happened just as we exited the sandstone 'house.'

In other Nottingham related news - I think it's great that Wollaton Hall in Nottingham will Wayne Manor in the new Batman movie. Batman finally comes home to his spiritual home county. Look out for a Wollaton Hall themed post soon and another game of "Where the Heck" - Peace my people and best wishes to all my Costa Rican readers. Loving your coffee, by the way!

What the heck is it?

2011-06-06T11:49:00.000-07:00

Okay, let's get interactive and have a quiz. Where was this picture taken? What is in the picture? What might you have found inside it at one point? There is a clue in the picture that will make it slightly easier...and the further away you are from my location the more impressed I will be if you know the answer. No, it's not from the new Planet of the Apes movie.

Stranger than People: Ants!

2011-06-03T12:41:00.000-07:00

It's pretty disappointing, isn't it? That there isn't a race of super-intelligent ants in charge of Mars. It was a regular feature of my childhood that there should be insects on Mars; from Quatermass and the Pit to a Dennis Wheatley story the name of which momentarily escapes me. Mars and insects go together like 'bee' and 'hive.' I dimly recall a 'reluctant reader' type boys book in my classroom when I was about 8 of a mission to Mars that encountered giant ants that was very similar to this illustration from the legendary Stranger than People annual. It ended with the following sentence (if I recall correctly) - "By the time you are a grown up Man will almost certaily have landed on Mars and we will know if it is capable of supporting life..." Yup, all very disappointing. One of my aims in life is to live sufficiently long to be interviewed as one of the last remaining people who recall watching an Apollo landing...I hoping this will be when I'm in a care home watching a Mars landing on the communal TV.

Anyways, super-intelligent ants are in charge of my dining room...well, they live underneath it and last month they built a beach under my radiator by carrying sand out from under the house grain by grain. I feel guilty about the ant poison. It sure is making them work slowly. Sigh. But if I don't do it; come swarming time, there'll thousands of the little devils running and flying around my house.

Stranger than People: Jungle Book

2011-06-01T09:39:00.000-07:00

And here from the Stranger than People annual is the illustration of Jungle Book's Mowgli used in the section on children raised by animals. Although, I, of course, saw Disney's Jungle Book as a child at the cinema but I recall an afternoon with inclement weather...the horse racing was rained off and the announcer on my local ITV station stated that there would now be a clip from Jungle Book...well, this was in the days when they just didn't show that much Disney on television - there were Bank Holiday specials...there was "The Wonderful World of Disney" on BBC - which often seemed to be nature type footage - but whole Disney movies were seldom, if ever, shown. So a clip of Jungle Book already had my attention; but this was the clip that wouldn't quit...plainly they didn't start at the beginning of the movie, but 40 odd minutes later the clip was still going strong. I'm conscious too that in the days before VHS kids watched TV in a completely different way. With no way to play something again you really had to pay attention. You might not see it again for months or even years in the case of a film.

Stranger than People: They Change by Night

2011-05-30T06:09:00.000-07:00

One of the most popular posts on this blog was a while ago now when I mentioned the old 'Stranger than People' hardcover annual from 1968 - this annual kept me occupied in some rainy playtimes at school and was one of the major inspirations for my work on Fortean Times. A pleasant gentleman e-mailed me a while ago asking to purchase it off me...well I'm afraid I'd better hang on to it, but for all the fans of this old annual here's a random page of art from it on werewolves. And assuming that Young World Productions or their heirs don't slap me with a cease and desist notice I'll continue to occasionally upload some of the images from it.

Fleeting Encounters with the Rich and Famous - (or hey, hey - he's a Monkee)

2011-05-25T11:46:00.000-07:00

The Metro Newspaper ran a story this week about how in the 1980's Micky Dolenz lived in Nottinghamshire at a place called Winthorpe Hall near Newark. Looking back, it all seems a little unlikely, but yes he did indeed live in Nottinghamshire and I used to see him quite a lot. Newark was the nearest town to where I grew up and the venue for my parents weekly shop. So it was, that me, or practically anybody could run into Micky in the Iceland frozen food store...I recall him as unshaven (well it was a Saturday) and generally wearing khaki shorts. I also don't recall anyone seeming to recognize him...more on that later... or hassle him for an autograph or anything. If he wanted anonymity he's found the perfect environment. Nobody in Newark was expecting to see a guy off TV so nobody did. I recognized him, of course, but as a shy kid I'd never have spoken to him. Had I had some fit of courage and tried too I expect my parents would've shouted me back. I didn't think of him as an actor more as a musician but I guess I could've in some alternate world told him I was interested in becoming an actor (true at the time) and he could've directed me to the workshop for child actors at the Central TV Studios (where he worked) and by now I'd be Dr Who..but nah, didn't happen. Was never going to either. The last time I saw him I was probably in my late teens. My parents were buying me the final stereo of my teenage years; it even had a remote control - and Micky was there. Right there in Curry's/Dixons in Newark playing a synth. Still no one recognized him. I didn't even know that he played keyboards...wasn't he the drummer?

Later, my Dad (who worked as a construction contracts manager) was working at the Central TV Studios. He was on a break in the cafeteria. He carried his tray to a nearby table and sat down next to someone he vaguely recognized...well he ought to know his face after all those near misses in the Iceland store..."So how's it going? Are you working on the studio extension?" Nope, didn't recognize 'im.

Micky, a fellow shopper from 1980's Newark salutes you.

The Masks of Terror (or another ad I spent too much time looking at as a kid...)

2011-05-16T11:52:00.000-07:00

Back in 1971, Kellogg's Corn Flakes packets had masks of Star Trek characters printed on the back. Through the miracle of my mother's bulk buying I managed to get all of them (except possibly the Klingon). Mother dearest threaded white elastic from her sewing box and out I went into the street to play to hand out the masks to friend/neighbours/whoever would wear them and play Trek with me. I remember I handed the Sulu mask to a boy called Gavin who was riding a bicycle - he rammed the eye-holes of the mask onto his handlebars to enlarge them so he could see better where he was cycling...oh well I guess he had a point...it is tricky to steer with limited vision. Finally, I had handed out all the masks; saving the Kirk one for myself (natch!). We ran around like idiots for a while then I spotted a neighbour's kid that I often played with at that time ('friend would be overstating it). Let's call him 'Little Jonny' - So we all ran towards him boisterously shouting - I guess Gavin was still on the bike - and, er Little Jonny had no idea who we were and ran away in terror. I'd never seen anyone so frightened. In fact, he went to get his Dad. By this time we had raised the masks and his Dad was saying, "You see it's just, Martin and Gavin (and Ichabod or whoever). I think he was still too shaken to play with us that evening. So, it makes me think, I was probably six years old and that was in what was then just an oversize village - now a small town - yet I was playing out in the street unsupervised like an old hand. I don't let my daughter play out and she is now 9. I guess it really is a different world.

After the masks I recall cereal boxes with a diarama on the back and transfers to stick on it. Tiny Klingons for faraway and big Klingons and Enterprise crew for closeup to establish scale. I recall affixing the tiniest Klingons nearest the front giving the whole thing a weird Land of the Giants feel to it.

Tightrope - 625 Line Event

2011-05-02T08:55:00.000-07:00

Spent a fascinating day at the 625 Line Cult TV event in Derby on Saturday at the QUAD media centre. Not so much a cinema as a sensory deprivation chamber...in there from 9:30 am until the late afternoon without any real sense of time passing in the outside world. Watched the first episode of Richard Carpenter's Catweazle - I met Carpenter when he was promoting Robin of Sherwood in Sherwood Forest in 1984 and, to be honest, Robin Hood and Dick Turpin were certainly more my thing than Catweazle but I certainly watched it as a toddler; probably without really understanding it. Geoffrey Bayldon as Catweazle is both creepy and physically repulsive (!) and I'd have run a mile if I'd found the time-travelling weirdo hiding in my barn. It was fascinating to learn from the programme notes that Bayldon had turned down the role of Doctor Who. But once again...didn't really 'get' the concept of Catweazle. The organisers of the 625 Line event obviously had grandiose plans to have pretend commercial breaks between the ad caps for Catweazle - rather scuppered by the inexperienced projectionist who seemed to think that "end of Part 1" meant the end of the show. So yeah, I did see Catweazle episode 1 but with a big gap between the two parts in a 'mop up' session in the afternoon. The Phantom projectionist struck again during "Soldier and Me" - a show I've never heard of before a sort of 'grim up north children's spy thriller' and not particularly good - and part 2 of this show two was relegated to the afternoon too.

And talking of the afternoon, we had to sit through a couple of Avengers episodes before getting to the highlight of the whole day; an episode of the long unseen but legendary Children's TV show Tightrope introduced by star Spencer Banks, who is perhaps best remembered as Simon from Timeslip. Tightrope is really one of my earliest TV viewing memories - I recall an episode where someone is drugged - I think with a truth drug - and not even knowing what the word 'drugged' meant but finding it incredibly menacing. I've always identified perhaps most strongly with fictional characters with the same firstname as me (Martin Brody, Marty McFly) but I supsect this started with Tightrope's central character Martin Clifford - as played by Banks. Tightrope currently only exists as B&W telerecordings but was released by Network DVD earlier this year. Tightrope's other incarnation was as a comic strip in my favourite British comic TV Action. During one of the events all to brief breaks fans (that's me!) were able to get his autograph...I've whined before about people who are not famous charging for autographs...no whine here. Spencer Banks' cult status would enable him to charge what he likes and I for one would've happily put some money into his pocket but, obviously too much the gent, he was happily signing programmes and Tightrope memorabilia (a pity that Tightrope DVDs were not on sale) - the only charge was if you wanted to buy a picture for him to sign. Anyways, I got him to sign the Tightrope page of a TV Action comic. Actually the same page was on display behind him as he signed by amazing coincidence...you'll see that he has signed it from 'Martin'!

I Smell a Legend

2011-03-29T11:47:00.000-07:00

Every so often, out of the blue, a friend, associate, work colleague or relative hits me with an urban legend. Now I've not made a special study of urban legends but I always know one when I hear one. Quite often it's one I've never heard before...the notable exception being..."Eddie Murphy paid my relative's hotel bill" - Y'know the one "Down, lady! Down!" Eddie shouts this in the lift but he's really talking to his dog but the relative; your elderly aunt thinks she's is being robbed and to make it up to her Eddie pays her hotel bill. NOW LISTEN HERE! HEAR YE! HEAR YE! This may come as a shock, but Eddie Murphy did not pay your aunt's hotel bill. Neither did Will Smith in the Will Smith version of the legend. Not even if this was just post 9/11 and will had extra security with him in case of a terrorist attack. In the version of this ancient urban legend that was desperately trying to sound current in October 2001. I first heard this one in 1993 and it was old then.

Next! No, a gentlemen of middle eastern appearance did not drop a wallet near a friend of yours in a shopping mall; have it be returned by said friend only to be warned: "You've done me a favour now I'll do you one - stay out of this mall on X date." This one I've heard the most, probably, different people, hundreds of miles and years apart - yet almost word for word the same.

Next! No, your relative did not give a ride to a mysterious old lady, suddenly feel uncomfortable...trick her out of the car...only discover later that she had left a handbag in the car and it had a hatchet in it. This I've heard since the eighties when it was also an episode of Roald Dahl's Tal es of the Unexpected. Yes the story is creepy the first time you hear it but you are still a sap for believing it.

Next! No, (and here is my most recent acquisition) no-one you know has ever eaten in a chinese restaurant and got a piece of metal lodged in their tooth then had to go to the dentist only to have the dentist tell them that it is the id chip from a dog. I mean, really.

Next! The police have traced my IP address and it turns out that I am making this post from inside the spare bedroom upstairs in your house right now. Don't go upstairs! Run! I'm a psychotic blogger with an axe. No come back! I was joking.

Cyborg Boy Versus the Living Hedge

2011-03-01T10:34:00.000-08:00

Around the age of eight or nine, circa 1975, I had watched so many episodes of The Six Million Dollar Man that I was pretty much convinced I was bionic myself. I hadn't been in a terrible accident or anything I just thought that at some point when I wasn't looking Oscar Goldman had had me fitted with robotic limbs. As I dashed around the school yard I could hear the Six Million Dollar Man theme tune (and just occasionally the earlier theme song - "Can't catch him if you can't beat him, if he can't love 'im - cos he's the man; Six Million Dollar Man...Six Million Dollar Man...) echoing in my empty head.

Part of the playing field of my school was a steep hill and sometimes we played a game of "British Bulldog" (for US readers - running past someone who tries to stop you). Well, we were playing this one day and I started running down the hill...cue bionic leg movement sound effects...towards a kid called Nigel who was built like a brick outbuilding...I had envisaged that my incredible speed and power would bounce him out of the way; instead I seemed to bounce off him and into the Hawthorne hedge which served as the boundary the school. Ow! It flamin' hurt. I took the advice of close personal friends and quit playing the game to retire hurt to "The Quiet Area" a central courtyard zone within the school. I sat on a bench with my buddies and became aware of sharp stabbing pain in my left forearm. I rolled up my shirt to find a tuft of greenish sappy wood sticking out of my skin. And, you'll have to trust me on this, but there were witnesses...I yanked out the green wood to reveal that it was just about the biggest hawthorne thorn I've ever seen. Had to be an inch and a half long. If I was bionic and this was a robotic arm why did it hurt so much? Conversely, if I had a real arm...where was the blood? The 'wound' for there was a hole in my arm that had to be the same length as the thorn was totally dry and bloodless. To tell you the truth I felt a little faint. My friends went to tell a dinner lady (lunch attendant) and she refused to believe that anything of the sort could possibly have happened. With the benefit of hindsight I think it warranted a tetanus shot at least. But we gave up trying to convince her and eventually we went back to playing. With, if there's any justice, my pal's regarding me as slightly more macho than they had. And I was able to go back to believing I was bionic.

Strange addendum: in about 1982, I suffered a deep puncture injury to my left wrist (yes wrist, where all those vital blood vessels are). And er, that didn't bleed either. So either I'm leading some kind of charmed life or Oscar Goldman had me fitted with a bionic left arm when I was a kid. Admit it. You can't catch me, if you can't beat me, if you can't love me...I'm the man.

The Day we met Chewbacca (at HMV)

2011-02-27T02:11:00.000-08:00

HMV Wheeler Gate in Nottingham ain't there no more...but here it is immortalised on the day last may when we met Peter Mayhew - Chewbacca from the Star Wars movies. Here's hoping anyone laid off by this closure has managed to get alternative employment in these troubled times.

As you'll see, Mr Mayhew was gracious enough to allow me to give him a hug in the photo - but on the whole he didn't seem too enthused to be in Nottingham...he seems a pretty quiet guy. Subsequently in his apperance at the nearby Monster Store my daughter asked him what the funniest thing was that ever happened to him while he was in costume as Chewbacca. He replied that this was the filming of the sequence in Empire when Harrison Ford is fixing the Millenium Falcon and the tools fell onto his head. Well, ya live and learn.

These pictures aren't great (the camera was playing up). But you'll get the idea.

Subconjunctival Haemorrhage Blogging!

2011-02-22T08:56:00.000-08:00

Just getting over a bad eye!! Normal service will be resumed soon, my people!

ADS I SPENT TOO MUCH TIME LOOKING AT WHEN I WAS A KID PART 1

2011-02-07T11:25:00.001-08:00

This was one of my favourite 1970's marvel ads. I spent hours planning which badges I would order but never seemed to get around to sending off the order. The special offer pack still looks like a good bargain. But I would've liked the Dr Strange and Conan badges too.

Forgotten Star Trek - Planet of the Dead Part 3

2011-02-07T11:18:00.000-08:00

oops. No time to scan and crop these properly tonight but you get the idea. Why is Kirk wearing red? He always seems to be in TV21 stories. I'm guessing the reference material they sent out was in black and white. Mind you, I didn't see Star Trek in colour until the late seventies.

These pages seem a little more rushed but still good stuff and long unseen. Unless you have the long-forgotten British annual in which they appear.

Forgotten Star Trek - Planet of the Dead Part 2

2011-02-01T11:38:00.000-08:00

Incredible effort here at making this look like an actual episode. Lovely 'beauty pass' of the Enterprise. And I'll even forgive the Tribbles being ripped off! So much better than Gold Key...

Forgotten Star Trek - Planet of the Dead - Part 1

2011-01-31T12:00:00.000-08:00

Mystery of Marsdon Manor Part 4

2011-01-29T07:54:00.000-08:00

I think one reason I like this story is that it is one of the first comic stories I tried to read and interpret on my own that didn't relate to a show I knew from television. The budget for the 1973 TV21 annual must've been radically slashed - there are no licensed characters other than Star Trek. I recall I didn't know what a nervous breakdown was when I read the story - but with the benefit of hindsight (and I'm no psychiatrist) Xavier Beach seems to be suffering some sort of disassociative psychotic episode - but what do I know? Anyway, I still find creepy the panel where he is walking off into the mist.

Werewolf on my Stairs (Reference)

2011-01-28T12:00:00.001-08:00

Here you see the reference photo I sent Enrique Alcatena of my stairs sans werewolf and the corresponding panel from the Cryptid Kid investigates strip. This version has the hand colouring and lettering that would later be re-done by FT designer Etienne Gilfillan.

Mystery of Marsdon Manor Part 3

2011-01-28T11:48:00.000-08:00

The giant spider in the third panel reminds me of 'Old Harrah' from a previous post! Since this was 1973 it was the first time I had come across the concept of Zombies.

Mystery of Marsdon Manor Part 2

2011-01-24T14:02:00.000-08:00

OK, so Bill and Harry are exploring Marsdon Manor - which is supposed to be haunted - but is actually a film set built only about a year before. And I suppose, rather like Quint's house in Jaws, it has been built to be a real, fully detailed building.

The Werewolf on the Stairs

2011-01-23T07:45:00.000-08:00

For those who enjoyed the Werewolf on the Stairs comic strip in Fortean Times 268, rest assured that Enrique Alcatena and I will be collaborating on something for Fortean Times over the next few months. And here on the Cryptid Kid blog we'll go behind the scenes and look at some of the photographic reference used in the production of the strip.

The Mystery of Marsdon Manor Part 1

2011-01-23T07:29:00.000-08:00

Here's a favourite creepy tale of mine out of the depths of an old annual on my bookshelf...more of this excellent tale and why I like it later in the week.

Sherlock Holmes - Crossover Casebook

2011-01-18T11:21:00.000-08:00

I've been reading it on other people's blogs - so I guess it must be true(!) - that my story "The Petrifying Well" is to be included in the new Holmes anthology from Moonstone Books. Certainly an honour to be published in the same volume as great writers such as Martin Powell and Joe Gentile. Many thanks to Editor Howard Hopkins for his input and feedback on the story. It should be out this spring and here's a sneak preview of the cover.

The Day we met K-9

2011-01-18T11:05:00.000-08:00

Maybe this post should be called my wife versus John Leeson! Last August we all went to the Fleet Air Arm Museum for their Dr Who day (like a mini-convention). The guest of honour was John Leeson who played (indeed still plays) K-9 in Dr Who and the Sarah Jane Adventures. John was charging for autographs and I don't begrudge him that - I happily handed over the moolah - but just out of shot in this picture is a gal who played one of the Weeping Angels (i.e. a non-speaking part in costume in a recent show) and she too was charging. I didn't like to break it to her that she's no more famous than I am. Anyways, this picture was taken at the exact moment my wife asked John Leeson if he ever got fed being nice to people all day. "What an extraordinary question!" is what he is mouthing in this pic.

Coming soon...

2009-11-18T12:22:00.000-08:00

My wife versus Vic Reeves. Which is the same story as Auntie Joan versus Matt Lucas. And the cool thing. She doesn't read this blog so she'll never know.

My Wife Versus the Chick from Thunderball

2009-11-17T12:03:00.000-08:00

How many years ago is it now? It must be at least ten. We went to the National Film Theatre on the South Bank to see a premier screening of the Jeremy Brett Sherlock Holmes TV movie "The Master Blackmailer" - the cast and crew were mingled in the audience - minus Jeremy Brett who was seriously ill, close to death, in fact. As the credits rolled I saw Claudine Auger's name scroll upwards and almost involuntarily in a stage whisper said words to the effect of - "Hey! The girl from Thunderball!" Shortly thereafter, Ms Auger appeared on screen and my wife, in a voice several decibels louder than a stage whisper said, "My God! Hasn't she aged!"

Unfortunately, it seemed Ms Auger was sat in front of us. She did stay for the whole movie but kinda slunk out at the end without joining the rest of the cast on stage for a question and answer session.

But you know what? We all age. And I'm sure it is better to age gracefully that to go the cosmetic route. Claudine Auger, I salute you.

The Last of Old Harrah

2009-11-08T07:43:00.000-08:00

You have been patient my people...so here goes.

Yes. This story involves me mercilessly killing a spider; so best that you mentally prepare yourself now. Not that I'm necessarily an arachnophobe...but I certainly wouldn't ever touch one. The household is full of family members who are arachnophobes though and it's muggins here who is called upon to terminate with extreme prejudice. Why not just put 'em outside, I hear you ask. Well, I'm pretty sure that the British house spider isn't designed for outdoor life and wouldn't last long anyway. That's my excuse and I'm sticking to it. Oh yeah...and the other thing you need to know is that the Fortean Times message board has a thread about spiders psychically communing with people...so away we go.

Last summer we stayed at a friends beautiful thatched cottage in Wiltshire...several days into the holiday my wife called my down to the hallway and said words to the effect of 'That has to die' as she pointed to the largest house spider I have ever seen as it ambled slowly in the direction of the under stairs pantry. Ambling is uncharacteristic of the species but this thing was frickin' huge - looked like it was four and a half inches across (maybe more). It is looked like it was changing course for the lounge where the kids were watching The Brave and the Bold. I took off my blue suede slipper (indicative of both middle age and an admiration of Elvis Presley) and whacked it. Just as I brought the slipper down the following thought (swear to God) popped into my head - "I've got a name, you know!" And then it was dead. I cleared up the mess and wondered why I suddenly thought of/or rather 'heard' the spider claim to have a name. Just pangs of guilt perhaps.

Our good friend Paul - the owner - dropped by later in the week. "What was the name of that giant spider that used to live in your pantry," I asked.

"Used to?," said Paul. "That was Old Harrah."

The spider had been right, he did have a name.

It begins again...

2009-10-26T13:16:00.000-07:00

Yes. I'm feeling slightly better so it's back to blogging this week. Tomorrow I will be revealing the unearthly and telepathic true story of low strangeness that can only be called, "The Last of Old Harrah."

See you then.

Torticollis Endurance Blogging

2009-09-26T03:02:00.000-07:00

OW! I've hurt my neck and can't type for longer than thirty seconds. That's not good for blogging. Ow! Again. Sweet Jesus it hurts...

Sunglasses to hide behind

2009-09-15T11:47:00.000-07:00

Yes. My darkened sunglasses were to blame - but I didn't realise this until a few days later when I was walking along the Trent embankment and saw a purple duck. Yup, somethin's gotta be wrong with that, I thought!

Purple Bullfinch

2009-09-10T12:35:00.001-07:00

I'm not much of a gardener - but if I don't garden just a little the whole place turns into a jungle. I'm even less of a birdspotter. But a coupla years back I did see a massive purple bullfinch in my garden - not just a little mauve on the wing - but all over dairy milk chocolate foil purple. Big, beautiful, large as life and totally impossible. For there's no such animal. Of course, nobody believed me and I got a little flavour of what it must be like to see the sasquatch and have no one believe you. A few days later I solved the ornithological mystery of what I'd seen and how I'd come to see it...have a think about it...let me know and I'll reveal all tomorrow if I get chance.

The Penny that Gravity Forgot - a tale of low strangeness

2009-09-08T12:33:00.000-07:00

I guess if I have one complaint, it's that my life isn't strange enough. Don't get me wrong. It's not completely mundane. But you probably couldn't turn it into a TV show. Over on their forum at the Fortean Times website there seems to be plenty of people who've seen ghosts, monsters and so forth...and so I wonder do we all (hmmm or maybe just some of us) have some overwhelming psychological urge to connect ourselves to the extraordinary - to what Fortean Times would call "High Strangeness"?

Since I can't, in all honesty, quite manage that...it set me wondering...if something weird but pretty small scale happened to me (what I shall call "Low Strangeness") would I even notice? Then I remembered what my subconscious was probably trying to tell me all along...this is the tale that I call "The Penny that Gravity Forgot."

Back in the early 1990's I was living in a small flat in Bethnal Green in the East End of London - the lounge was about the same size as the bathroom in the dilapidated mansion in which I now reside. I was working as a Law Clerk but since I'm really a writer I was sat in my lounge writing in a notebook in pencil. I made a mistake in my writing and reached for a plastic eraser (we sometimes call them 'rubbers' in England - but US readers please don't get the wrong idea). Leaning againsty the eraser at an angle of 45 degrees on the bookshelf was a penny. I removed the eraser from the shelf - rubbed out the offending error - and went to return the eraser. The penny had remained balanced at a 45 degree angle with nothing holding it up. I made a mental note to clean the shelf; there was obviously some sticky residue holding the penny in place. I carried on working for a moment but the precariously balanced penny distracted me. Finally, I pushed it down so that it was horizontal with rather more force than was probably required. I picked the penny up and also examined the shelf. Dramatic musical chord - DUN-DUN-DAAAH! There was no sticky residue nor indeed any other reason why the coin had stayed at that angle. I leaned it against the eraser several times and tried to duplicate the feat - even when doing it extremely carefully it was impossible to reproduce the effect. I had the penny that gravity forgot. I probably should've had it framed or mounted or something but I didn't. So the penny is just out there somewhere in circulation.

Tomorrow: The Mysterious Case of the Purple Bullfinch

D C Thomson Blood Debt

2009-09-02T12:55:00.000-07:00

I suppose owe a blood debt to D C Thomson for buying my first comic story

back in 1988. I grew up reading "Bullet" comic - always my favourite. In particular, the Tales of Solomon Knight; mysterious gentleman raconteur. Here's "Black Dougal's Blood Debt" by (I think) Carlos Freixas (unless you know better - D C Thomson stories are uncredited). Naturally, the story is copyright D C Thomson. Hopefully they will put out some reprint vols and then I'll be able to tell you to buy them.

Who Nose?

2009-09-01T10:34:00.000-07:00

Here's one of my favourite Atlas Comics - "The Two-Faced Man" by Joe Maneely. Maneely died tragically young, but had he lived I'm sure he'd have gone on to be one of Marvel's biggest artists. A Marvel Masterwork of his work will be issued shortly (featuring his work on the Black Knight). I urge you all to buy it.

Nessie Photo Query

2009-08-26T11:54:00.000-07:00

CP Dean has a letter in this month's Fortean Times querying the captions on the Daily Mirror cover which accompanied my article in FT 250. He's quite right that they appear to be incorrect. I'll look into this further but the second from left is the famous 'surgeon' photo taken in 1934. The two right hand side photos are notorious Frank Searle fakes - so beneath the contempt of Steuart Campbell in his definitive and scholarly work "The Loch Ness Monster The Evidence" that he doesn't bother to reproduce them, But he does say: "No doubt frustrated by N's (Nessie's) non-appearance he resorted to photographing models and logs....later he began to photograph pieces of a brontosaurus stuck on a water background." I suspect these right hand side pictures are earlier than the attributed dates (1975 anf 1976) and will look into this further.

I have no idea about the extreme left hand pic - dated 1964. Suggestions anyone?

Homicidal Vs. The Blood Beast Terror

2009-07-20T12:39:00.000-07:00

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W002CnqpE40

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VpBYBeErFes

So, one night in...maybe 1975 or 76...I begged my Mum to let me stay up and watch a horror film. The film showing on (I think) Yorkshire TV's "Appointment with Fear" segment was William Castle's Homicidal - a rip off of Psycho. We started watching it and then at about 11:00 PM my Dad came home...

"What are you doing?" he asked.
"Watching a horror film," we replied.
"This isn't a horror movie - it's some rubbishy thriller - a rip off of Psycho." He checks the newspaper listings. "There's a horror film on the Midlands TV (our other ITV channel) - It's the Blood Beast Terror."

He insisted that we switch over...it was from about the point you see in the You Tube clip...but within fifteen minutes he was asleep. Mum got up and changed the channel back to Yorkshire so we could watch the end of Homicidal (see other clip).

To this day, I'm not sure I've ever seen either film all the way through...this was my second successful attempt to 'beg to see a horror movie' the other being a [few] weeks earlier...not really sure of the timescales after all this time when I managed to see the vastly superior and infinitely more frightening "Brides of Dracula."

Only a Man who's Pure in Heart...

2009-07-19T12:59:00.000-07:00

Wow! I'm working on a new project involving a story about a werewolf. Can't tell you much at the moment - but it's big potatoes. Right, I'm off to buy some silver bullets. And tomorrow, I'll tell you about the evening I watched The Bloodbeast Terror and Homicidal simultaneously.

The Monkeys in the Wallpaper

2009-07-14T11:17:00.001-07:00

This is the Five Arrows Hotel in Buckinghamshire. While staying here for a family wedding when I was very small - probably about three - I came down with a fever and became delirious. At one point that long night...I was convinced that monkeys were coming out of the wallpaper in the bedroom to attack/bite me or whatever.

I'm sure that the hotel has got rid of the monkeys by now - it's probably perfectly safe to stay there. Probably.

The Blue Kite

2009-07-11T08:44:00.000-07:00

When I was about three years old, my Dad woke me up in the middle of the night and carried me out of the house to the car. I looked back at the house and caught in the guttering was a midnight blue kite with a white (very frightening) face painted on it. The kite was rattling in the guttering making a terrible noise. My Mum was in the car too and so we drove far away - as you should if ever a kite is caught in your guttering - EVACUATE - get as far away as you possibly can. We started a new life far from the terrifying kite and though I missed our old house and my toys it was obvious why we had left - and certainly best not spoken about. Then, a couple of weeks later my Dad announced that we would be going back to our old house. How could he have forgotten so soon about the evil kite? I reminded him - he had no idea what I was talking about. Apparently, I had just had a dream; and we had not started a new life - this was just a holiday.

We returned to the house and lived a comparatively normal life. And today, of course I don't have a phobia about kites, but if I happened to see one leering down at me while it flapped against the barge boards - well I wouldn't really be exactly surprised.

NEXT: The Monkeys in the Wallpaper

The Girl Behind the Glass

2009-06-30T11:24:00.000-07:00

This is one of my favourite old Atlas Comics stories - art by Jay Scott Pike. I hope you enjoy it.

Thylacines 2

2009-06-29T10:08:00.001-07:00

Sorry. Can't stop for long. Have to clear a lot of thylacine doo-doo off my lawn and then I need to feed the dodo's.

Thylacines

2009-06-26T10:17:00.000-07:00

If you people get any of these coming into your garden you better let me know as soon as possible. They are best dealt with by us professional monster hunters.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6vqCCI1ZF7o&feature=related

The Goons Vs. The Loch Ness Monster

2009-06-22T12:17:00.001-07:00

We're inching even closer to the end of Loch Ness Monster theme month here at Cryptid Kid...and I've discovered I feel dizzy if this site doesn't have a Loch Ness oriented posting. The Goon Show was a BBC radio comedy show from the 1950's featuring Harry Secombe, Peter Sellers and Spike Milligan. Here is a comic strip of its incarnation as The Telegoons - a BBC animated show circa 1966 (which even I am not old enough to remember). Naturally the Telegoons travel to Loch Ness where they [SPOILER ALERT]. Just kidding. I think you get the general idea around here now...

Peace my people...

A gentle rain falls softly on my weary eyes...

2009-06-20T09:12:00.000-07:00

Here's a link to some You Tube footage from the War of the Worlds stage show. This is an older version of the show and for people interested in such things the Richard Burton hologram is now considerably better...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D7vfjJHcfeE&feature=related

Enjoy!!

The Chances of Anything Coming from Mars

2009-06-18T12:39:00.000-07:00

Last night I went to see the War of the Worlds show at the Trent FM Arena here in Nottingham. Wow! If this ever on anywhere near you go and see it. A true multi media experience - CGI, full size model work, cinema, holograms, pyrotechnics and live performance. The band and orchestra were superb - with Jeff Wayne conducting - driving the whole thing forward by effort of will and personal charisma. A brilliant ensemble cast, yet surely special mention must be made of Justin Hayward. His rendition of 'Forever Autumn' was a tour de force. The only possible criticism might be that they need to build in more time between numbers for audience applause. It also seems incredible that a show as technically complex as this is being moved around the country performing one night stands. I suspect they could've filled the arena for a couple more nights.

Not Yeti

2009-06-18T12:24:00.001-07:00

People are always saying to me, "Surely, there's more to Cryptozoology than the Loch Ness Monster?" And I say, "Huh? Really? Are you sure? Let me google that and get back to you." As the end of the month approaches let me ween you off the heroin that is Nessie with the methadone that is the Abominable Snowman courtesy of the artistic genius of Don Newton - also a great artist on The Phantom. This page is from the Many Ghosts of Doctor Graves by Charlton Comics in 1974. This page was, I think, also reprinted in Peter Hainings Ancient Mysteries book - don't have that to hand but I guess it was mid/late 70's. Peace my people.

Nessie Regina

2009-06-16T11:51:00.000-07:00

Well, we are getting near to the end of this series of posts which are intended to share material linked to my article in this month's Fortean Times (the Crypto Kid Investigates). Here is the novelty certificate mentioned which 'proves' ahem that I saw Nessie. As the article tries to point out - I guess no one really 'sees' the creature:- they either mis-observe the chimera of various other phenomena (did I coin that phrase? Don't even know any more) or they deliberately fake.

Today I am feeling cynical...today I feel that if a plesiosaur rose out of Loch Ness and bit me in the ass (to paraphrase Matt Hooper) - I'd probably just say, "Hmmm, nice animatronics! Where's the film crew...?"

The question remains...what did George Spicer and his wife see cross the road and dive into the loch? It is the genesis of the modern myth that requires the most explaining still. They had little to gain and risked widespread exposure to ridicule. Which is a nasty thing. I think if I ever did see anything beyond the normal mode of human experience (whatever it was) I'd keep it to myself. And so probably should you.

A Lifelong Affair with Ingrid Pitt

2009-06-14T11:16:00.000-07:00

Thirty two years ago in self-catering accommodation Inverness...I began a love-affair with Ingrid Pitt. I was just 11...she was chronologically 40, but immortalised in the movie Vampire Lovers - showing on late night TV. Yup, just the right age to watch Popeye in the late afternoon and Hammer Horror at bedtime. My bed was conveniently located in the lounge...she by turns was beautiful and yet also scared the bejesus out of me. She pops up in some great films: The Wicker Man, Where Eagles Dare and even Who Dares Wins (and that's just the movies beginning with 'W').

Tales Out of School

2009-06-13T01:17:00.000-07:00

I am reminded that my parents took me out of school in June 1977 to look for the Loch Ness Monster. I think the Local Education Authority might frown on that now - but I'm assured that all necessary forms were filled in. Note my Chinese sounding school name - a 'wong' is a field in old english. I also think I arrived back about the same time as the postcard.

The Face in the Water?

2009-06-10T10:55:00.000-07:00

I've mentioned that I'm posting things that wouldn't fit into the pages of the 'Crypto Kid' investigates article in Fortean Times this week. Here's a page from the Daily Mirror circa 1975 which shows the Rines photos of...well...of what...these pictures seemed quite freaky in 1975...but they don't really match the expectations of us plesiosaur fanboys. Roll forward to 1977 and my Dad drew what was supposed to be a scuba diver complete with breath mask/regulator in felt tip over the image of the 'monster's' head to demonstrate to me that it could be anything. If you ignore the diver-cum-parachutist Dad drew and turn your head 90 degrees you should see the rocky bottom of the loch instead of the sea-slug/monster. Did nobody realise this at the time? Well as the guy on CBBC's Prank Patrol is always saying...High Five? Scuba dive!

That's me in the corner...that's me in the spotlight

2009-06-08T10:47:00.000-07:00

See down on the bottom right? That's me they're talking about y'know. I don't know who's more fed of me plugging this particular issue me or you. Good magazine though...worth the price for the article on imaginary friends. http://www.forteantimes.com/front_website/themag/

There's the link. See how they call me the Crypto Kid? It's confusing having two very similar nicknames. Oh well.

They Won't Let You Live Past 30

2009-06-07T09:08:00.000-07:00

This week I'm thinking a lot about June 1977 because of my "Crypto Kid" - still not figured out why my name had to change in print - article in Fortean Times (#250). If you're on the same continent as a W H Smith or other major magazine retail outlet I crassly exhort you to spend your hard-earned cash on it (while you still can). In the article I make reference to the fact that my eleven year old alter-ego found Scotland a much better country than England because of the easy availability of Marvel Comics and so scanned in here is one of the comics that made him feel that way. Superheroes were slightly (and very unusally for me) out of vogue at the time. I was strongly attracted to Logan's Run because it was a comic of an 'adult' science fiction movie. This film had a 'AA' admission certificate (fourteen years and above) so realistically there was no way that I was going to get to see it in the foreseeable future. Issue 6 is an epilogue to the events in the film but it does recap the events around pages 6&7 making them look very exciting indeed. What you can see here is a Jim Steranko cover - really stood out from the morass of other comcis on the Inverness newsagent wall rack where I saw it. I really enjoyed this issue - John Warner's script is great - not sure what else he wrote, I'll have to check. And Terry Austin's inking could probably make even my pencilling look good (and an artist I ain't). The euthanasia at 30 concept in Logan's Run never struck me as a problem at the time. Even when I was 18 I remember thinking people who were 24 were positively ancient. How did they get to be so old?

The picture is me at Lower Foyers - monster hunter Frank Searle's base of operations. Taken a few minutes after he gave my question about sightings of the monster on land short shrift. So yeah, probably went home and read the Logan's Run comic to console myself. In the back is a Thanos solo story - which was cool - and allows dealers even now to ramp up the price of the issue.

See you in the the funny papers, my people.

Stranger than People

2009-06-04T13:28:00.000-07:00

Here's a couple of things that didn't quite make it into the latest issue of Fortean Times - one grainy polaroid of me and my mother, Shirley, on top of the tower at Castle Urquhart overlooking Loch Ness. She was freaked out by the height but is trying not to show it here. This is June 1977, so I am just barely eleven years old.

The other is the cover of the Stranger than People annual circa 1968 - I first saw this book in infants school - maybe even in a rainy playtime box, can't recall now. But this picture is the first image of the Loch Ness Monster that I ever saw.

Since it's now almost exactly 32 years since the events described in the article I'll be telling you more tomorrow about what happened that week...see you then people.

Asylum in our Backyard

2009-06-03T13:15:00.000-07:00

People often ask me...does your dilapidated mansion really overlook a former insane asylum? Yes it does. Although in the summer the trees block the view so you can only just make out the very top of the chapel bell tower. It is like living next to Arkham Asylum from Batman or maybe Dr Seward's asylum in Dracula. Some people who live even nearer to it than I do have become excited and contacted the BBC. See link below - this is my first ever link so I hope it works.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/nottingham/content/articles/2009/05/28/mapperly_asylum_feature.shtml

Compare and contrast to Enrique Alcatena's Arkham Asylum (pictured). Did I ever tell you how Gotham in Nottinghamshire is the inspiration for Gotham City in Batman? No? I'll explain it some time. All I need to do now is discover that Mapperley is the inspiration Arkham - but H P Lovecraft never came to Nottinghamshire - as far as I know.

Barnabé at Loch Ness

2009-06-02T12:17:00.001-07:00

Etienne Gilfillan, the multi-talented designer on Fortean Times, recently sent me this Barnabe comic strip that he wrote for the French magazine Spirou. I'm sure he wouldn't mind me sharing it with you, just don't ask me to translate it. The only thing worse than my French is my Spanish!

Slayer in the Mist

2009-06-02T11:49:00.000-07:00

Over on his blog Enrique Alcatena has been posting some superb images from his STARBLAZER days. Time for me to follow suit but with something slightly different...here's the cover to Slayer in the Mist painted by Ian Kennedy but based closely on Enrique's interior art work. The script written so along ago that I don't even want to think about it...bashed out on my girl friend (now wife!)'s portable typewriter when owning a word processor was a far off pipe-dream.

All the Fun of the Fair...

2009-06-01T09:39:00.000-07:00

I've been obsessed with the British Hardover annuals, probably, all my life. They stand like mileposts in my childhood. Here's a couple with interesting covers. The TV Comic Annual 1968 shows 2nd Doctor Who, Patrick Troughton, taking a roller coaster ride with Beetle Bailey and Popeye - now there's something you don't see too often! Unfortunately, it looks like the Daleks at bottom left are going to spoil everyone's day - or at least Adam Adamant's (caped guy jumping onto the ride superstructure...if you recognize any of the more obscure characters then let me know.

Next! The TV Tornado Annual (not marked with the year but copyright 1967). From my point of view great to see the Phantom and the Green Hornet in the same place at the same time. Not sure why Magnus Robot Fighter is taking center stage - weren't too may kids pretending to be him in the schoolyard...nor why fleet of foot Kato is getting left so far behind. Maybe he was tied up parking Black Beauty. Take it easy my people.

And so it begins...

2009-05-29T02:07:00.000-07:00

Welcome to my first ever blog post...I have finally joined the late 20th Century several years too late.

If you are interested in Cryptozoology and the Loch Ness Monster please check out the latest issue of Fortean Times (that's #250), where for some reason I have become known as the "Crypto Kid" - confusing eh? - the NSA may sue at any moment! Here you will find a full-length illustrated article about when I went looking for the Loch Ness Monster in 1977 at age 11!